Tragicomedy: The Bad Jokes of Politics

A sharp wit has long been admired as an admirable quality in our politicians; an acerbic put down or an insult that comes clothed in humour allows us to see their human side, as well as how quickly they can react to diffuse a situation, or indeed ignite one.

The correlation between humour and intelligence is one that has often been touted, and while many comedians are clearly insightful people, few of them have ever made the decision to run for office. Well, except for Al Murray. 

We want to believe that our politicians are erudite, well-versed in a number of different fields and that they will not be caught on the hop by a question they weren't expecting. That latter quality is one that sees itself expressed in the lively exchanges between them across the floor of the houses of parliament, and while a heated debate on a particular issue might make the news, the moments that often grab the public attention are those times when the humour emerges and we get to see that our leaders are not emotionless robots.

Barney Frank, who served in the House of Representatives until 2013, became known for his wit and withering remarks, but speaking on a recent episode of Slate's podcast The Gist, he did feel that there were a few that he wished he could take back. Not, it should be stated, because they were bad or unfunny, but as a result of them overstepping a mark and crossing that line between humour and offence. It is a delicate balancing act, but the right combination shows both opponents and the electorate that a certain politician is capable of defending themselves and their point of view, not to mention that they are intelligent. There are a number of studies that back this theory up; a 2008 paper from the University of Colorado, for example, confirms that "effective humor productions acts as an honest indicator of intelligence in humans", and while there they talk about "general intelligence", perhaps the best phrase to use would be emotional intelligence.

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Displaying a sense of humour involves timing, good judgement and mental agility; a formidable and rare combination. GK Chesterton, writing in The Innocence of Father Brown, praised a young politician who was a rising star with the following assessment of his wit: "when he thought of a joke he made it, and was called brilliant. When he could not think of a joke he said that this was no time for trifling, and was called able". While that might seem like a slippery move, it displays the acumen needed to read the situation and decide when it's time to make light of something, and when it's time to get down to business.

It should come as little surprise then that politicians frequently look to throw in a joke when they appear in public, in an effort to connect with their audience and break the ice. While some of them hit home, the vast majority are laboured and clunky, and end up sounding like they were the jokes that were left on the floor in the writers' room of a late night chat show host.

Hillary Clinton

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As the most recognisable candidate in the democratic camp, Hilary has a long campaign ahead of her where she can expect to be the butt of some rather unfunny jokes, but that doesn't mean that people are going to stop trying to have the funniest Hillary Clinton email scandal joke. As the list of Republican candidates grows longer and longer, she becomes the easiest target for any of the presidential hopefuls to rally against. At the recent First in the Nation Republican Leadership Summit, a veritable rogues gallery (when it comes to comedy, anyway) appeared with their best material.

Bobby Jindal of Louisiana had possibly the best of the jokes when he went with a classic bait and switch, starting his speech with a breakdown of what he was going to talk about, only to pause midway through his introduction and claim he was giving the wrong speech.



The final line of his fake intro is a jab at what turned out to be an apocryphal claim on Clinton's part that her grandparents had all been immigrants to America, but Jindal wasn't the only one poking fun at Clinton at that summit, although his routine was probably the best.

Senator Ted Cruz

Cruz also tried his hand at a few jokes at Clinton's expense, most of which would get him booed off the stage at a comedy club, but brought a chuckle out of the partisan crowd in attendance. Here, he makes reference to the "Scooby Van" that she was travelling the country in, with a joke that seems to come from and go absolutely nowhere.



This wasn't the first time Cruz had tried his hand at Clinton comedy either, for example a rather crude and clearly pre-rehearsed gag aimed at Bill managed to get a laugh out of Sean Hannity, but if he hopes to make a career out of stand-up, he'll need to work on his Winston Churchill impression.

Marco Rubio, another in the long list of candidates who fancies himself as the next president, also decided to get a joke in about Clinton's visit to the Chipotle chain of restaurants, only to pronounce it incorrectly.

 

British Politics

There has always been a tradition of trading blows across the floor of the Commons, and while they don't always land, they are often better than the efforts above, many of which are more likely to elicit a cringe rather than a laugh, verging on 'dad joke' territory.

The British exchanges are more heated, done at a rather remarkable pace, and often in direct response to an opponent, giving each person involved the chance to fire back with their own quip, making for a much better spectacle. For instance, this exchange between Cameron and Miliband references the former's texts to Rebekah Brooks, and former Labour leader Gordon Brown's apparent penchant for throwing phones.

At times it can cross a line and verges toward that most detestable of phrases, boyish "banter", with a chauvinist edge that is rather unpleasant.

Kebab-gate 

Ireland's attempts are somewhat less frequent, and while there are many iconic comedy writers and performers from the lands of saints and scholars, none of them seem to be writing gags for the politicians just yet.

One of the most famous examples of an attempt at humour in the Dail that went awry was Conor Lenihan's remarks about "kebabs" while in his capacity as Minister for Overseas Development and Aid, a fact which added an extra edge of unpleasantness to the remarks. Lenihan advised Joe Higgins to "stick with the kebabs", and while he thought it was funny, no one else (particularly not Higgins) was laughing.



Perhaps the intelligence that governs humour is one that our politicians are not all that familiar with: emotional intelligence. The best comedians sit as outsiders, they take a position in opposition to the popular opinion or mainstream view, most of the time to point out that there are other sides to an issue that is not being given due coverage. Doing that as a politician means courting controversy, and for obvious reasons the majority won't want to do that. That doesn't mean politicians won't try their hand at the odd joke, mainly because, as in the examples cited above with Barney Frank, it can win favour with a lot of people, and allows them to perform one of the more difficult balancing acts in politics: demonstrating intelligence without seeming arrogant. The humour of the moment humanises them, while the riposte displays the type of wit and speed of thought that we want in our representatives and often wish we had ourselves. Most of the time though, we're just not getting the joke. 

The plight of the creative black player

I regularly listen to the Americarnage podcast, and this past week they were discussing racism in American sports and the name 'Redskins' for the Washington NFL franchise. This reminded me of a previous discussion they had regarding the pigeon-holing of players in to certain positions in the NFL as a result of their skin colour, and while at first I thought this may have been a problem for American sports, in fact this is also an issue in football in Europe.

Whether it is something you have acknowledged or not, it seems increasingly difficult if not impossible to find a player who sits behind the striker or an attacking midfielder or a jinky winger who is not either white European or South American in the Premier League or La Liga. Certainly I can't think of many of the top of my head, bar Steven Pienaar.

It would be absurd to suggest that there are none, but it seems that whether it is by institutionalised design at grass roots level or a sense that still exists that the best players for those positions are Hispanic or white, somewhere along the line players form Africa or of African descent are put into different positions on the pitch where creativity is not as highly valued. Certainly, in the NFL until recently, the Hall of Fame quarterbacks were without exception white, and as the old football saying goes, perhaps their face just didn't fit. Even if those players have displayed a touch of flair or ability to pass in to good areas, that is often ignored in favour of playing them further back the pitch, in particular in defensive midfield.

Something which also pointed me towards this topic was a piece I wrote recently on Jay Jay Okocha, arguably one of the last great showmen of football (along with Ronaldinho). I say this because while Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi are clearly fantastic footballers, they're not showmen. They do tricks purely in a functional way in order to score goals, which they do by the bucket load. Okocha and Ronaldinho appear to get great joy (as does the crowd, it should be added) from the feat of pulling off the unexpected. In case you've forgotten Jay Jay, sit back and enjoy this clip.

George Weah was another hugely talented player who, while more of a striker than a creative midfielder, still showed incredible vision for a pass, went on weaving runs and mesmerised us with spectacular goals. Not that it should need to be included of course, but we all remember this all-time classic one against Verona.

Difficult to watch that without thinking of the Football Italia theme tune with James Richardson enjoying an espresso at a piazza.

Anyway, back to business. Other creative players who spring to mind are those like Finidi George, highly prized as a creative force, not as a defensive midfielder; Clarence Seedorf , who is still playing in Brazil and has shown that he is more than capable of fulfilling that role and there would be very few people who would not say that he is a player of real class.

These examples are all of midfielders who you could build a team around, who would dictate the pace of a game and produce a moment of genius that would decide it. While there are many strikers who are not white in the Premier League and other European leagues, these players are often not as skillful or creative as those cited above, perhaps because the demand (and therefore the money for smaller clubs and academies) is in producing players who are physically strong, powerful, and have enough technique to be a purely functional player in their position. Although Drogba is clearly gifted with technique and skill, and perhaps even Romelu Lukaku also, both of those players are always discussed in terms of their physical attributes first and foremost.

Michael Essien and John Obi Mikel were two of the most highly rated midfielders in African football in recent memory, and yet at Chelsea, both were put behind the midfield to shield the defence. Essien came to the Premier League with a reputation as the creative force in the midfield of Ghana's national team, but ended up being, for want of a better word, a clogger. He showed his ability and technique with a memorable goal against Barcelona on his left foot, but it was not enough to see him moved further up the field and given a bit more freedom. In fact, as his career progressed, he ended up being shoved in at right back and the odd time at centre back, simply because of his frame.

Mikel has also not produced the goods in the middle of the park for Chelsea, but also while playing out of position. It should not be glossed over that Manchester United and the London club virtually went to war over how highly rated this teenager was, and then wasted his talent by playing him in a part of the pitch that he wasn't comfortable in. Yet still, when he plays for Nigeria and is given a more advanced role, he looks like a totally different player and fans wonder why that is.

While not from Africa, Anderson was a black player who arrived to England with the tag of the 'New Ronaldinho' hanging around his neck like a millstone. It turns out that he needn't have worried about that, as he was immediately sent to defensive midfield to get through the work and break up the play. He was also sent to the gym to bulk up, and even the most casual Premier League fan will tell you that he's not exactly a vision of physical fitness.



Perhaps, on reflection, he is not meant to carry that much muscle, perhaps he was destined not to get through defensive work where any Manchester United fan will tell you he's not really suited to playing, perhaps, indeed, his frame when he arrived allowed him to manoeuvre and turn quickly, to wriggle away from challenges and to glide around the area of the box producing smart passes and moments of excellence. Ask fans if that's the Anderson they would have preferred to see, the one whose debut season saw him play to a very high standard, and you will only get one answer.

But that is the way the game has gone. The production (and I choose that word deliberately) of young players is now big business, and you make a product to suit demand. That demand is for someone who can run for 90 or 120 minutes, make a tackle and maybe shoot the odd time.

There is the possibility that, like in Brazilian football, the money is in making players of a certain type and that has caused this shift. Years ago, before Spain arrived with their tiki taka football Brazil shifted their attentions to producing athletic players who were more physical than the opposition, and still technically solid.  Now they're laden down with midfielders who can shore up the defence, but struggle to find one creative striker, a position where they were spoiled for choice for decades.

To return to where we started out with the NFL, even the terminology in and of itself is becoming tainted, with the world "athletic" or "mobile" being used almost exclusively for black players in American football. The NFL in recent years has seen a huge sea change, where now some of the best and most versatile quarterbacks in the game are not white. Robert Griffin III proved that last season, Cam Newton had a record breaking debut year, Russell Wilson (also deemed too small to play the position) was absolutely irresistible and nearly lead the Seahwaks to the Championship game in the NFC. Is there a lesson to be learned from this?

I would argue that there is. The franchises in the NFL are slowly but surely learning that when a player is "athletic" or "mobile" as they insist on saying, but also has creativity, quick thinking, an eye for a pass, he becomes a player a level above his opposition who have been trained to remain static, and at times predictable. Plonking that player down in a different position because he's "athletic" makes no sense for the player or the team.

While the differences between footballing cultures all around the world are not huge, in most places the emphasis when a child picks up a football to start playing is not on accurately playing a long ball into the channels and getting through their defensive workload, it's on being inventive, creative, having fun, and showing individual skill. Perhaps these assets are coached out of players in Europe, and with centres of excellence and academies hoovering up players at a younger and younger age, we may have seen the last of the Okochas or Weahs of this world, until one outstanding candidate breaks the mould for the rest of those who follow behind him. So, where have all the showmen gone?

Manchester United's big summer signings haven't come in the transfer market, but the financial markets

With the on running Wayne Rooney saga, most of the attention has focused on the fact that Manchester United have made their transfer dealings very public indeed this summer, while not landing any of their top targets.

While this will mean that whoever they do sign (rumours persist about Modric and other midfielders) is left in the awkward position of knowing that they were not top of the list for the Moyes era at Old Trafford, there has been plenty of business done behind closed doors for the club this season that won't add anything to the playing squad, but is as important.

This morning, they once again sealed another deal that the fans won't get excited about, but that will certainly keep everyone in the boardroom happy for the coming season.

United and Bulova announce three year sponsorship as watchmaker becomes Club’s Official Timekeeper and Global Partner:http://t.co/Ps38rHoNCu
— MU Spokesperson (@MU_Spokesperson) August 14, 2013

This sounds like a fairly standard corporate partnership, but having spotted a fantastic article recently by Owen Gibson of The Guardian, outlining exactly what sponsorship deals Manchester United have around the globe, today's is simply another in a long list of huge deals that have moved the company (and thus the club) away from the burden of debt that the Glazers were believed to have saddled the club with when they took it over several years ago. The same paper also have a fantastic gallery that shows all these deals in pictures, from official motorcycle partners in Thailand to the Mister Potato deal, which makes them the exclusive and official partner of the savoury snack.

In April, another deal was announced which continues to reinforce the club's credentials as a hugely powerful wordlwide brand, which was estimated to be in the region of £120 to £150 million for the naming rights to their training ground with shirt sponsors Aon, not to mention their kit sponsor Nike, who they also have a large deal with.

Most recently, at the end of July, they inked a deal with PepsiCo to increase their presence in the Asian market, making them the official sponsor of the soft drink in Thailand, Malaysia, Singapore, Myanmar, Cambodia, Laos and Brunei. They have deals with wine companies in Chile, diesel engine manufacturers, telecommunications firms across Asia and Africa, beers, printers, airlines, and pretty much anything you can think of. All of this means that they have a 31% increase in year on year commercial revenues, all in the midst of a global recession. If you are a fan of any other club that has been taken over in the recent few years, and are wondering how for example, John Henry at Liverpool plans to make a profit, or why Monaco, PSG, Manchester City and Chelsea aren't afraid to throw money into their squads, then this model is the reason why.

None of this will excite the fans, who wanted to buy Fabregas or Thiago Alcantara jerseys this summer, but for a club which is most certainly in transition, at the very least for the start of this season, the future is definitely not bleak.

Fans should also remember that this is the squad which one the Premier League, and they haven't lost anyone in the market (yet). They still maintain a position as a team and a brand which attracts the best names, and while the summer might not have shown that for the first team squad, the deals that were done in the boardroom should begin to quell the worries that many had about the way in which the American owners bought Manchester United by leveraging to borrow and place the club "in debt", an incredibly common practice in business and in American sports ownership. Yes, technically on the books they were in the red, but the continued success on the pitch coupled with some fantastic marketing behind the scenes has meant that they were never in any danger.

The most worrying aspect of not getting a marquee name in this summer is that they need a marketable name and face to continue to seal these deals, but for now, the very name of the club itself will ensure that they are pushed through. The two arms of this business depend very much on one another. Success on the field breeds success in the marketing department, but of course, the money for the signings which help the team win will need to be generated somehow. Perhaps, the very vocal way in which Manchester United (both Ed Woodward and David Moyes, who are the new partnership that have taken over from Gill and Ferguson as vice-chairman and manager respectively) is a learning curve for the pair, but it also may be a signal to fans and other clubs alike, that the budget is there to compete in the transfer market, but with a business sensibility from Woodward that won't see them overspend.

The haul of silverware that Manchester United have won in the past two and a half decades is an example which the other clubs in England and beyond would be desperate to achieve, but their achievements on the books are equally the envy of their competitors. Their latest deal with their "official timepiece partner" this morning is merely a further indication that indeed, the times they are a-changing.

Star Trek Into Darkness footage

I'm pretty lucky in that my new internship has me doing some pretty incredible things, working for JOE.ie.

On Monday, I got to go to a screening of about a half hour of Star Trek footage from the new movie due out in May, and it was absolutely fantastic.

This particular clip was in 2D, but the final version will be beautiful 3D Imax with all the bells and whistles, and it's going to be an absolute corker.

There was a great feeling of suspense throughout the opening sequence in the key scenes where we're introduced to the main characters and re-introduced to those from the last movie if you missed it, so in that sense it can certainly stand alone. Still, it wouldn't hurt to head out and see it it before hand either.

The main villain, played by Benedict Cumberbatch, also looks like he'll be a memorable one, who launches an attack on Star Fleet from within their own ranks.



I'm not going to give anything away from what I saw, you're going to be tired from all the tense gripping of the arm rests that you'll be doing during this one.

Perhaps I'm showing my true colours here, but in one particular scene, my instant thought was "bloody Hell, Star Wars is going to be incredible".

I won't deny that this title will probably be less "Trekky" and more open to a wider audience, but it will probably be all the better for it, and if you haven't already gotten involved in the pre-booking (which started this morning), then you probably should.

It's going to be bloody brilliant, and I already can't wait to see the rest. The ending of the last scene we were shown got an audible gasp throughout the cinema of battled-hardened critics (also I was there like a big fresh faced n00b), so you should get excited. Now.

Positives and Negatives from Man United vs. Liverpool

Although Liverpool lost again to their Manchester rivals, there are some positive points to be taken from the game, as well as negative ones.

Liverpool's first half yesterday against Manchester United in Old Trafford left them with a huge amount of work to do in the following 45 minutes to claw themselves back into a respectable position. Rodgers mismanaged from the start, making a poor decision in terms of sitting back and trying to control possession in parts of the field where it only amounted to sterile domination.

When he made changes which had an impact, it was good management, and he spotted where things were going wrong, but it does suggest that he hadn't made the right decisions from the start. Sterling was ineffective, largely thanks to good defending from Rafael. It is worrying of course, that the young winger was closed down so easily by the United right back, but it is an important challenge for Sterling to learn how to impose himself on a game where his pace is matched and his space is restricted now that he has been given a long term contract.

With Lucas sitting very deep, Allen needed to play a bigger role in moving the ball, and while he grew into the game, he looked completely lost for around 70 minutes. His closing down was poor, his tackling was non-existent, and as a player worth £15 million, you have to expect a higher standard of play.

His placement in the wall was also baffling, as it made Reina panic because he was clearly unaware of where to stand, and possibly afraid of joining the wall, leaving a large gap between him and the man next to him. Reina was constantly screaming at him to move, but he seemed totally clueless. Given how quick people were to criticise Nasri for similar behaviour a few weeks ago against the same opposition, it's important that British players should be held to the same standards.

Van Persie showed what a class striker he is once he gets a run of games when he's fit, and ideally suits a United team whose midfield is still trying to click with one another. They didn't create a huge amount, but the Dutch international barely needs a touch to find the back of the net.   

There seems to be a disconnect of some description between the Liverpool back line and the midfield when it comes to covering, and another disconnect with the midfield and the strikers when it comes to attacking. Neither Wisdom or Downing was sure of who should push out to close the cross that led to the first goal, and that gave United time to pick their pass easily. Wisdom did do better later in the game, and does look to be a good defensive talent. He has strength, power and pace, all the attributes of a solid player in the Premiership.

When Sturridge came on, he offered a directness and the desire to take players on, which had been missing from a strangely quiet Suárez, who looked like he was either fatigued or out of sorts. His touch was off, but he didn't see much of the ball either, which makes it more difficult to settle into the game.

By my count, it took Liverpool nearly 35 minutes to threaten De Gea's goal, which makes life much easier for a United defence that had a centre back pairing who have been struggling with injuries. Simply put, they needed to work that pair harder to test their match fitness, by pulling them out of position and separating them, which can only be done with quick movement of the ball. This did happen when the changes were made to bring on some strikers to support Suarez, and led to the goal also.

With Sturridge sitting higher and Suárez coming deep to get possession, there seemed to be a little bit more of a plan than there was in the first half. Although Sturridge missed a further two opportunities, he did get into position to score, and with a few more games under his belt he should be stronger in the coming weeks. He's also not fully fit yet, having played almost no football in six months.

 

The return of Borini, although only for a fleeting appearance, is also good news for Liverpool, given how short they have been up front. Borini displayed, in his few minutes on the pitch, that he has a quality touch and a bit of vision. Between himself and Sturridge, a run of games may finally see more attacking options for Liverpool, who are desperately short of goalscorers.

This is also a learning curve for Rodgers himself, who has to find a way to get the players at his disposal to be more consistent. Allen played very well against Sunderland, but that ambition and quickness he showed there was lacking yesterday. With time, this squad could gel together nicely, and with rumours of Sneijder possibly joining the Anfield team, there is also the possibility of Allen getting the challenge of real, world class competition for his place despite Rodgers' clear allegiance to him.

Overall, Rodgers should be able to guide the club to a higher finish than the 8th place in which they currently reside, but Champions League football is a long way off, with next season being the earliest possible point at which they could realistically qualify.